Friday, June 26, 2009

Validation

I am a better person for watching this video many times and trying to implement it into my life.

This past week was rough (as has been my summer job all around). Because the other 2 therapist quit the week before I was doing the work of 3 this week. Each day I did 4 straight hours of group therapy followed by another (at least) 2 hours of notes. The kids I'm working with have a lot of issues but I love them and there is intrinsic value in working with them. Thank goodness it is so because there is really no validation coming from anywhere else. My boss is completely overworked, overwhelmed, dealing with catastrophic issues day after day, and doesn't have the time to truly thank or validate our staff. I know they need it because I do (thanks to those of you who let me vent to you and validate me!)

For the first few weeks I was a bit absorbed in my desperation for validation and a bit uneasy with my need to be appreciated. Then I realized that everyone I was working with was in the same boat--overworked, exhausted, and sorely needing validation. So I wrote a few notes in the wee hours of the morning with a flashlight under the beautiful stars to let each of them know what I had noticed about them.

The notes were nothing big but when I looked in their eyes as I handed each of them a note I saw myself-my need to feel that I mattered-that what I was doing was good enough. One of my coworkers (upon receiving her note) just burst into tears. She is on the cusp of quitting.

I guess what I'm saying is it doesn't take much to validate others. To sincerely compliment the people you love in your life. To notice the little things they do. To thank them for what they bring to your life and let them know that they are AMAZING!



4 comments:

Angela Annjilla Ferny Fern said...

I <3 this video! I saw a year or so ago!

Ryan and Kim said...

Your job sounds hard! Hopefully you will have some good stories out of it all!

smiliesar said...

You are awesome!! I'm glad you took the time to help those you are working will feel important. I'll have to wait to watch the video once the kids are in bed since it's 16 minutes. Thanks for the post and reminder to look for the little positive things in life and let me people know about them.

Chantalita said...

Good job implementing the principle. When I saw this video, it made me think of this NPR story I had previously heard.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=102128212