A big part of the new fiction novel I'm writing is about grief, loss, love, healing, and how when tragedy strike things get all jumbled up. Faith falters, people rise to occasion or they crumble under the stress. Everyone grieves differently.
It is strange the things you remember in times of deep dispair. I remember the week my brother died that we go so much food that it was rotting on our counter b/c we couldn't fit it into our fridge. I remember literally praying that people would stop bringing over flowers b/c they just ended up dying all over our house. I remember thinking that I hated people b/c they said the stupidest things in the most inappropriate times. I remember wishing someone would help my sister find a way to sleep b/c she had been awake for days on end. These are the things I was thinking about b/c the alternative, at the time, was too painful.
As I write about grief I it is hard to go back there—to the funeral, the days before, the days after. I have always wanted to write something that had to do with healing and hope that this new book will do it justice.
For those of you who have grieved and stood on the precipice of despair I am wondering what random thoughts consumed your mind and heart. I want to capture grief in its most naked and vulnerable state. If you are willing to share I would appreciate your feedback.